Category Archives: DINKS on the Farm

The Age of Artifice

What kind of work is best for our bodies?

My partner Brock, a full-time vegetable farmer, spends his work day lifting heavy tubs of carrots, yanking out overgrown weeds and balancing precariously on ladders to build greenhouses.

I type.

Surprisingly, I was the one injured this summer.

After eight years of working full-time on a computer, my hands went on strike: I could no longer use a keyboard or hold a mouse without pain tearing my tendons from fingertip to elbow. Bilateral forearm extensor tendinitis. All thanks to a too-high desk and my determination to soldier on through the warning signs of pain.

Unable to work (or even whine about it on Facebook), I spent three months on our couch under ice packs, slathered in ibuprofen cream, trying to cool the invisible burning in my arms, wrists and hands.

The Strongbow cider helped too.

At my second appointment with Vince, my physiotherapist, I commented on the strangeness of being wounded by a desk job, while Brock manages to do physically challenging work all day long without being maimed.

Vince said that, actually, it’s logical that my work would be more damaging. Human bodies are meant to perform a diversity of tasks all day, from hunting and gathering to farming and cooking. But then humans started doing jobs where they repeated the same motion over and over again.

That guy on the assembly line who inserts bolts into pieces of metal might think he’s got a sweet job at $30 an hour with benefits, but forcing your body to do the same motion all day is unnatural. Typing is a perfect example.

Modern, urban work vs. historical, rural work

When you think about it, many aspects of modern jobs aren’t natural.

Weather & seasonality

I spend my weekdays in an air-conditioned, fluorescent-lit, indoor environment. Even in the hottest summer months, me and my fellow office wonks wear the same dark sweaters and drink orange pekoe: the temperature is a steady 16 degrees to prevent us from dozing at our desks.

On the other hand, Farmer Brock checks the forecast constantly: if it’s going to rain, that changes his to-do list. He can lose thousands of dollars of income if he misreads the clouds blowing through our valley, so he’s honed his spidey-sense for impending frost, rain and snow.

My annual work cycle is unrelated to what’s happening outside the sealed windows: my only clue to the time of year is the month on my Dilbert desk calendar. I work set hours regardless of the season. In the winter I commute in the dark and spend my daylight hours in a cubicle.

But Brock’s schedule is inherently seasonal. He works thirteen-hour days seven days a week in the growing season, because weeds and crops don’t take weekends or evenings off. In the winter he’ll sleep until 9 a.m., spend a leisurely four or five hours planning the next farming season, then happily read or binge-watch Mad Men episodes on DVD with me. Brock’s work hours are dictated by the season and the amount of sunlight.

Brock reviews our seed supply.

What we wear

Our clothes may be the most obvious proof of how artificial urban work has become. At work, I wear skirts made of fabric that will inevitably wrinkle when I sit all day, even though sitting all day is inherent to my job. Many of my office-appropriate clothes require ironing or even dry cleaning – the two most time-consuming, impractical clothes-care activities.

At least I, unlike my male colleagues, don’t have to wear a tie. Neck ties serve no practical purpose whatsoever, and are often uncomfortably tight. How did they become an office staple? Men with office jobs aren’t only strangled by ties: they are also expected to shave daily. When we started our farm, the first sign of Brock deviating from his then-career path of a bureaucrat was that he stopped shaving.

In contrast, practicality, comfort and common sense are the defining characteristics of farm clothes. We perfected our farm “outfits” our first season, and have watched our apprentices and employees go through the same refining process themselves every year since. The principles:

  • A wide-brimmed hat to protect your eyes from sun glare.
  • Sunglasses are useless because you can’t tell if a strawberry is ripe through shaded lenses.
  • A long shirt. Anyone who thinks they don’t need one when bending over all day will go home with a firey red burn across the small of their back.
  • Pockets, ideally in both your pants and shirt(s), to hold screws when building, bits of twine found in the field, and to-do lists.
  • Two kinds of footwear: gumboots for deep-tilled soil and wet weather, and crocs or other easily-removed shoes, so you can go into and out of the house without stopping to untie laces.
  • Finally, layers. If you have to go inside to change every time the temperature drops or climbs, you’ll never get anything done.

The Age of Artifice

This dichotomy between the natural and the unnatural is not new. One of my English Lit professors taught us about the late-nineteenth-century writers who prized artifice over the Romantics’ view of “wild” nature. These “Decadents” thought the perfect garden was one in which nature was entirely controlled. For example: shrubbery was pruned into shapes. Symmetry prevailed.

I considered the Decadents extreme, and ridiculous for thinking they could impose structure onto nature. But over the past five years I have been exposed daily to the glaring contrast between my nine-to-five world of desk work and our life on the farm.

In urban North America, the Decadents have succeeded. We work in controlled environments, and are no longer subject to weather or the seasons.

Longing for authenticity

And yet, for many of us this brave new world doesn’t feel quite right. As Physio Vince pointed out, human biology has not evolved as quickly as our society. iPhones became a household staple after five years, but we’re still getting rid of our tailbones. Part of us longs for a simpler time.

Some of us react to this vague feeling of dissatisfaction by trying to recreate our great-grandparents’ world.

One extreme example is the latest wave of the “back to the land” movement: Brock and I aren’t the only thirty-somethings to flee our condo and start a farm. Those who remain in their townhouses are picketing for the right to backyard chickens.

Mainstream brands see this restlessness and start marketing their “natural” products, made from “real” ingredients. Authenticity is a trend.

Brock pulls up a plant of preemie red potatoes to see how the crop is faring.

Sales of canning supplies are rising, even though most city slickers buy their berries and pickling cukes rather than grow their own. Urban men stop shaving – then pay $60 to get their facial hair styled in retro barbershops. Some of us manage virtual farms on the Internet. We’ve settled for the meta-natural.

Can we go back?

But this might not be enough.

After three months of physiotherapy and a month of limited computer use, my hands are starting to hurt again. I’m beginning to accept, reluctantly, that my tendinitis may be a chronic condition. My body now refuses to spend forty hours a week on a computer.

And I have to wonder: in this virtual world we’ve created, what else can I do?

What else can we do?

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Originally published in The Winnipeg Review on December 7, 2012.

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Revelations

Apocalypse-proof skills ground us in a digital age

I crave an apocalypse. Not the sort where the earth implodes, or even the kind that wipes out half the population and creates a Lord of the Flies society. I want an apocalypse where we no longer have electricity, fossil fuels or chequing accounts. (Okay, maybe I’m not pro-apocalypse: maybe I’m just a Luddite.)

For years I’ve felt that our decadent, hedonistic North American society is a single Jenga block away from collapse.

Call it “peak oil” or “climate change” or “I can’t afford to stay home with my new baby because child care is cheaper than me not working”— call it whatever you want. We’ve built a tower so high that we can’t remember how or why we started. I want to see what happens when the pieces fall and we have to rebuild.

My desire to return to a simpler time is probably a reaction to how complicated life has become in the past ten years, not just for me as I aged into full-time work and a mortgage, but also for our society. We live in the Information Age, yet have no idea how our world works.

Where does pepper come from? How does a radio work? Such information is only a Google search or YouTube video away, but instead of asking the “why” of things we waste our time with Netflix and Facebook.

We’re confident that this information will always be available, if we need it. But in a post-apocalyptic world (with no electricity, much less the Internet), it will be too late to ask Google how to light a fire without matches.

Mission: Learn apocalypse-friendly skills

This feeling of becoming disconnected from the practical world, of realizing I no longer understood how things worked, first hit me at age nineteen — coincidentally, when I got my first email address.

In 1999, with Y2K looming, I inventoried my skills and realized I would have nothing to offer, should my desire for a simpler society come true and the Industrial-Technological Age be knocked to its pale, bony knees. Thanks to my university education I could write essays and parse a poem. My skills would not feed, shelter or heal anyone in the New World. I would have nothing to offer as society struggled to rebuild.

That summer I took action, in the form of a quilting class. And when I wrapped myself in the warm blanket I’d made, I tasted empowerment. I no longer depended on the industrial system — I could make my own blankets, thank you very much. I knew how to use a sewing machine, and sew by hand if necessary.

And once I understood the logic of how a quilt is made, of how a sewing machine runs, I could control the process. I could improvise, be creative and improve on the status quo. When I saw quilts that others had made, I was no longer detached: I saw the quilt’s components, admired skilled stitching and felt a connection to the quilt maker. Those few sewing classes made me hungry to learn more skills.

Years later, when my husband Brock proposed that we abandon our urban condo and start a ten-acre vegetable farm, my apocalypse fantasies became more practical. Maybe society wouldn’t collapse, maybe we’d still have a mortgage and hydro bills, but we would be growing our own food and building our own home. Living on a farm would test my mettle for the practical, grounded life I longed for. And it has.

My love of learning practical skills is necessary to my adopted role as a “farm wife.” When you have 600 tomato plants in your backyard, it makes sense to learn how to make and can salsa.

For one summer I worked alongside Brock on our farm and learned skills that will get me into any post-apocalypse commune. Show me a handful of seeds, and I can tell you what they’ll grow: I know the seed that looks like a mummified tooth will become Swiss chard, while the thin rice grain will leaf out into lettuce. I can distinguish cabbage from cauliflower when they’re still only seedlings (no small feat). I know exactly when a broccoli crown is ready for harvest, judging by the tightness of the head, and even how to cut it so the stalk will continue to produce more side shoots.

After five years on our farm I can make pickled beets, sauerkraut, jam, sprouts, garlic scape jelly, kombucha and cheese. I know which seeds can be saved for planting, and how to save them.

The Renaissance Women

Despite gaining all these useful abilities, in 2011 I realized there were still hundreds of skills I could learn. Through the farm I’d met many amazing local women who, with young families and/or businesses to run, were just as busy as I was, but whom I wanted to get to know better. It would be inefficient to cultivate friendships with so many busy people separately, so I invited these women to join me in learning a new practical skill as a group once a month for a year.

I limited my invitation list to the artists— writers, photographers, jewelry makers and other craftspeople— so the monthly gatherings would also provide regular inspiration for our art, and we could document the experience through blog posts, audio documentaries, paintings, et cetera.

At our first meeting I served sprouted wheat bread, cheese and kombucha that I’d made. We named ourselves the Renaissance Women.

A year and a half later, I can sew clothing from a pattern and have made pottery dishes. I can make bread from a sourdough starter, yogurt and soap. I know there’s a patch of heal-all growing as a weed in my front yard, and how to peel and eat a thistle. Last week I learned to use a fly rod and spin reel to catch fish. Compared to where I was at age nineteen, I would be an incredible asset to any post-apocalyptic community.

And sure, maybe the system won’t collapse. Maybe our society will continue to evolve (or not) and we’ll meander along, our smartphones getting smarter as we become more disconnected from the foundations of this world we’ve created, more dependent on the luxuries and conveniences our parents and grandparents invented so we could live a life of leisure.

All I know is that, as I learn more practical skills, I feel more grounded in this increasingly complex, overwhelming, abstract world.

“Apocalypse” comes from a Greek word meaning “uncover” or “reveal,” and I like knowing what lies beneath.

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Originally published in The Winnipeg Review on June 27, 2012.

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